I’ve thought about this a lot.
Somewhere along the way, people started confusing love with love marriages.
Like once it’s registered, once it’s official, it becomes real.
As if getting someone legally in your name somehow gives you control over them.
But honestly… it feels more like how we register a house, or a car.
Ownership. Possession. Control.
That’s what it’s becoming.
Love was never meant to be about control.
Today, when people say “I love you,” what they often mean is:
“I love the version of you that listens to me.”
“I love you… but only if you stay mine.”
“I love you… as long as you behave how I expect you to.”
And that’s the problem.
That’s not love.
That’s a deal.
We’ve turned love into a conditional contract, not a space to grow.
We’ve made it about expectations instead of acceptance.
About fear of loss instead of freedom to feel.
Real love is unconditional.
It has to be. Otherwise it’s just emotional dependency in disguise.
It’s not about being in the same house, city, or relationship status.
It’s not about seeing someone every day.
It’s about how you feel for them even when they’re not in front of you.
Even when they’ve chosen someone else.
Even when the story doesn’t end the way you imagined.
You can still love them.
You can still wish them well.
You can still hold space for their presence in your heart — without needing them to be present in your life.
Because love, real love, is not about owning someone.
It’s about honouring who they are, no matter where they are, who they’re with, or what they choose.
I’m not saying don’t commit.
I’m not saying don’t get married.
I’m just saying… don’t reduce love to a registration form.
Don’t think just because someone’s legally “yours,”
they owe you their freedom.
If it’s really love, it should breathe, not beg.
It should give, not grip.
And if one day, they decide to walk away…
then you let them go.
Not because you stopped loving them.
But because you loved them enough not to turn that love into control.
– Aman
